Yes, we said it: we’re impostors. We were having a team conversation recently in which imposter syndrome came up. One person after another started confessing that they sometimes feel like they’re faking it and people will find out. The crazy thing is that these are all highly competent people! No one else ever saw them the way they feared they were seen.
The truth is that pretty much everyone except Michael Jordan has experienced impostor syndrome. No matter who you are, you can find a reason to see yourself as a fake: you’re too young, or too old, or you don’t have the right degree, or you don’t have the same experience as others… take your pick.
To make the point, several of us volunteered to explain why we’re impostors and how we try to succeed anyway. 🙂
Kat is beginning her career journey.
Feeling like I’m lagging behind some of my friends and colleagues is a frequent source of insecurity. Despite my efforts, I can’t shake the feeling that I’m not keeping pace with their rate of progress. This comparison often leads to a sense of inadequacy and self-doubt. Additionally, at work I often find myself struggling to match the level of knowledge and understanding demonstrated by my coworkers. Their understanding of client lingo highlights my own deficiencies in this area, making me feel like an outsider or an impostor in the workplace. My lack of confidence sets back my ability to fully contribute and excel in my role, perpetuating the cycle of feeling like I don’t belong.
Carolina has redefined her purpose and transitioned her career.
As I shift from being the voice in a room to enabling others to find their own voices, the spotlight is inspiring and illuminating, but also harsh and crippling. Impostor syndrome is real, even for someone with a many decades-long, successful career – wanting to be perfect, comparing myself to others and being terribly afraid to fail. As a leadership coach, I find it’s also a very real sentiment carried by folks across personalities, careers and roles. Here’s my take from what I have learned:
- Embrace the journey you’ve been on, its triumphs and tribulations, because it led you to this moment of opportunity.
- When someone offers you a seat at the table, sit down! It means others see the value you bring.
- Remove the mask that holds you back – you know, the one that helps you look like others – because who you are is what we want to see.
Charles has had a long career and works on a multigenerational team.
I’ve heard people early in their careers say “I’m inexperienced,” or “What do I know?” But as someone with decades of experience, my fear is the opposite: “Maybe I’m not relevant anymore.” I mean, the world changes really fast, so maybe the younger people I work with are quietly rolling their eyes at the old guy. I don’t know how to get rid of that impulse; the best I can do is try to use it as a motivator. Instead of saying, “Maybe I’m an impostor,” I try to say “Maybe I’m wrong about this specific issue.” Instead of questioning myself, I try to question my assumptions about what I’m working on. That’s a lot more valuable.
Kari now lives in Ohio…and has never lived in New York City.
I grew up in a small college town in Ohio. And as soon as I could manage it, I fled to Chicago in my early 20’s. I had my theater life, my temp jobs. Eventually, I transitioned into jobs being the only comms person at a social service agency and then at an Association. I earned a Masters of Integrated Marketing Communications. Then, like life does, things changed. I came back to the small college town to be close to my Mom. I had a hard time getting interviews. One of the guys I played kickball with growing up told me, “Nobody here cares what you did in Chicago. When you come back here, you have to start all over.” Talk about my confidence taking a hit. I know the kind of value and experience I bring, but it’s been very different from my colleagues. Which, actually, should be good. Because in my work life, I have done things no one else at Integral has done. But…you know.
Lauren struggles to own her identity as a woman, a mom and a professional bada**
My symptoms started in graduate school when I would constantly qualify my addition to any conversation with, “I know I’ve been a stay at home mom for the past 6 years, but in my decades-long career as an executive before kids, I…” You can fill in the blank with a variety of highly relevant anecdotes that elevated the conversations and firmly positioned me as a stellar peer and student in my cohort. My sickness continued to metastasize in the next phase of my career. Despite the theoretical knowledge I gained at Columbia, and the practical experience I now had on the job, there was still no way that I was qualified to coach leaders of billion dollar companies on how critical strategic communication was to both their organizational and personal success. I’ve come to live with my disease and now embrace it as the universe’s way of keeping me humble and hungry. If I feel like I don’t deserve it, I hustle to learn and grow. My impostor syndrome is a constant reminder to do better than I did yesterday.
So…what kind of imposter are you?
Did we make you feel better? Join our successful imposter club – maybe we’ll make t-shirts. 😉