Building a business has a way of stripping away theory and replacing it with practice.
There is no perfect handbook for navigating hard conversations, shared risk, people’s livelihoods, or the weight of decisions that ripple far beyond you. Over time, you stop relying on what leadership should look like and start paying attention to what actually works.
After nearly eight years of building a company from the ground up, these are the lessons that shaped how I lead and how I see the work.
1. Age and experience do not equal expertise or leadership
Years on a résumé do not automatically translate to sound judgment, strong leadership, or quality work.
I have worked with people decades into their careers who were not the most thoughtful voices in the room, and with people early in theirs who brought clarity, rigor, and better answers. Expertise shows up in how someone thinks, listens, adapts, and delivers — not in how long they have been doing the work.
The strongest leaders make room for the best thinking, regardless of where it comes from.
2. Clear is kind and required to grow
(Thanks Brené Brown!)
Feedback is uncomfortable. Sitting on it is worse.
Clarity is one of the greatest acts of kindness you can offer someone. Praise what is working, celebrate wins loudly, and quickly share when something is not working.
When feedback is timely and direct, people grow faster, teams move more effectively, and trust deepens. In my experience, the people who receive honest feedback are almost always grateful even when it is hard to hear.
3. If you have a seat at the table, use your voice
For yourself, and especially for others.
Advocating for others is leadership. Speaking up when it is uncomfortable, inconvenient, or unwelcome is part of the responsibility that comes with influence.
I was fortunate to build a company where there was trust with my co-founder and our board, and where that trust extended to telling the truth even when it was hard. The same is true with clients.
Regardless of if your idea gets shut down or a decision does not change — your voice still matters, use it.
4. Trust is everything
You cannot build a business without it.
Trust is what carries you through uncertainty, conflict, change, and growth pains. It means believing that the person across the table is not protecting themselves, but acting in the best interest of the company and the people within it.
It takes time to build and seconds to lose. If I ever build something again, I would not do it with anyone I did not deeply know and trust.
5. You cannot be afraid of change
Change is constant. Every year, something needs to evolve. The strategy. The structure. The offering. The way you work. Strong leaders do not resist the change –- they normalize it.
What matters most is being clear — every single time — about what is changing and why. When people understand the rationale, and when they trust that the mission remains steady even as the path shifts, they are far more willing to move with you.
6. Be human. Be vulnerable. Be courageous.
Leadership is not about having all the answers. It is about showing up honestly.
Letting your team see you as a human (not just a role) creates safety. Vulnerability invites vulnerability, and being courageous gives others permission to do the same.
I have always erred on the side of over-sharing rather than under-sharing. Something as simple as having therapy blocked publicly on my calendar signals that it is okay to prioritize mental health, and that space is available for others to do the same.
Vulnerability matters way more than we think, and even if not immediately recognized it is almost always immediately felt.
What startups get right that large organizations often lose
Startups are forced into constant evolution. They learn, adapt, and change because they have to. Vulnerability, experimentation, and comfort with uncertainty are built into their DNA.
Too often as companies grow they lose this muscle. Things become stagnant, risk-averse, and overly corporate.
The opportunity for larger organizations is to reclaim what startups do best. Evolve continuously, lead human-first, and stay open to learning.
What startups get right that large organizations often lose
Startups are forced into constant evolution. They learn, adapt, and change because they have to. Vulnerability, experimentation, and comfort with uncertainty are built into their DNA.
Too often as companies grow they lose this muscle. Things become stagnant, risk-averse, and overly corporate.
The opportunity for larger organizations is to reclaim what startups do best. Evolve continuously, lead human-first, and stay open to learning.
Because the moment you stop learning is the moment you stop leading.